and I know I don't need to write so freakin much, but this guy (cute guy, I might add) just walked in, sat at a computer and is playing solitaire. the library closes in an hour, and he just got here, and he's playing solitaire...
that's all.
May 31, 2007
paranoia
man. I don't know what's going on. my day started out okay. I had some goofy horoscope about how wonderful things were going to happen.. then it was all downhill after that. evil horoscope.
my car is freaking out on me. I went to start it this morning and it took a couple tries before it would rev up okay. then when it did, the radio locked itself and there were beeps coming at me from every direction (audis have the weirdest safety features). the first thing I thought was.. maybe I should have taken the bus and this is karma yelling at me to be considerate of the environment. though it got me to campus okay. but then AFTER school it seemed even worse. it was taking forever to start and things were flashing and I was dreading having to call my dad and tell him I broke his car. but, once again, it drove fine. it seemed like it was just spazzing out when I tried to get it to start so I figured it was the battery. (though there were no warnings flying at me about the frickin battery.. )
the weirdest thing happened after I had gotten home and eaten some food and then left to head back to school. I turn the ignition- "rrrrhhgrrrrhgrrr..." nothing. uh oh. turn it off, try it again- "rrrhhggggghhh" barely starts. the radio's locked, but no beeps, and my automatic all the way down window feature doesn't work. (usually, you can just tap it down and the window lowers all the way) the weirdest thing was.. my gas gauge was showing that I had more gas in it than I did when I left this morning. but just like before, it drove like it always does after I got it started. so I'm driving and I call my mom to tell her about it. she gives me all these tidbits: "if the gas reader is messed up that's not a good sign." (I know) "make sure you keep your windows rolled up because if the battery dies and they're still down and it starts raining, you're screwed." (yeah) "when you get to school, if it gets you to school, turn it off, then start it up again and see what it does." (okay) so I get to the parking lot, after a very tense drive there, turn it off, say a couple nice words to it, and start it again, expecting the worst. the thing starts perfectly! not even a hint of trying. and the gas gauge still says I have more gas than I thought. I don't know what's going on!!! my car is possessed. and I have no idea what to expect now, which is horrible.
in other news, it was a nice day today and I was worried all day that it wouldn't be. my schoolwork isn't half as demanding as I was making myself think it was. and people aren't nearly as bad as I've been believing they are (at least most of them).
a life lived in fear is a life half lived?
my car is freaking out on me. I went to start it this morning and it took a couple tries before it would rev up okay. then when it did, the radio locked itself and there were beeps coming at me from every direction (audis have the weirdest safety features). the first thing I thought was.. maybe I should have taken the bus and this is karma yelling at me to be considerate of the environment. though it got me to campus okay. but then AFTER school it seemed even worse. it was taking forever to start and things were flashing and I was dreading having to call my dad and tell him I broke his car. but, once again, it drove fine. it seemed like it was just spazzing out when I tried to get it to start so I figured it was the battery. (though there were no warnings flying at me about the frickin battery.. )
the weirdest thing happened after I had gotten home and eaten some food and then left to head back to school. I turn the ignition- "rrrrhhgrrrrhgrrr..." nothing. uh oh. turn it off, try it again- "rrrhhggggghhh" barely starts. the radio's locked, but no beeps, and my automatic all the way down window feature doesn't work. (usually, you can just tap it down and the window lowers all the way) the weirdest thing was.. my gas gauge was showing that I had more gas in it than I did when I left this morning. but just like before, it drove like it always does after I got it started. so I'm driving and I call my mom to tell her about it. she gives me all these tidbits: "if the gas reader is messed up that's not a good sign." (I know) "make sure you keep your windows rolled up because if the battery dies and they're still down and it starts raining, you're screwed." (yeah) "when you get to school, if it gets you to school, turn it off, then start it up again and see what it does." (okay) so I get to the parking lot, after a very tense drive there, turn it off, say a couple nice words to it, and start it again, expecting the worst. the thing starts perfectly! not even a hint of trying. and the gas gauge still says I have more gas than I thought. I don't know what's going on!!! my car is possessed. and I have no idea what to expect now, which is horrible.
in other news, it was a nice day today and I was worried all day that it wouldn't be. my schoolwork isn't half as demanding as I was making myself think it was. and people aren't nearly as bad as I've been believing they are (at least most of them).
a life lived in fear is a life half lived?
May 30, 2007
:/
blah. summer school sucks. I always get like this.. I like learning. no problem. medieval England is fricking interesting. I just hate having to turn in assignments and participate in discussions and read things before a certain date. uck. not to mention even showing up to class is a pain.
today, in my class, someone brought in pizza for their lunch and the entire room smelled like pizza. I was about to go insane if I didn't get some pizza. AND some guy blocked my view of this other guy who I like to look at..
I can't get pizza out of my mind now, but I can't go buy any because I have no goddamn MONEY. (complain complain) now if I could just motivate myself to actually look for a job and stop waiting for one to fall into my lap.
I think I'm going to have to change something soon. either relating to me or to other people. this can't go on much longer.
today, in my class, someone brought in pizza for their lunch and the entire room smelled like pizza. I was about to go insane if I didn't get some pizza. AND some guy blocked my view of this other guy who I like to look at..
I can't get pizza out of my mind now, but I can't go buy any because I have no goddamn MONEY. (complain complain) now if I could just motivate myself to actually look for a job and stop waiting for one to fall into my lap.
I think I'm going to have to change something soon. either relating to me or to other people. this can't go on much longer.
May 15, 2007
May 14, 2007
and summer arrives..
ba ba baaa ba.
okay, so. first day of my first summer class. I like it. hopefully I'll learn lots. it's just weird because we have it everyday so I have to read like two books by next week and we have a paper due friday. :/ I will survive!
I was just looking at the checklist of requirements for my major so that I could figure out whether or not I need (or can use) certain other classes that are offered this summer.. and I realize that I don't need to take another french class! I've fulfilled my requirement. well, assuming I pass this semester that is. but it's weird. I'm actually slightly bummed that I don't HAVE to take any more french, because I don't think I'm gonna do it if I don't have to...
some of my friends are taking it again next semester and I was already excited to be in a class with them again. :( I'm such a doofus.
cRazYyy- I just looked outside and it's all cloudy and you can barely see the mountains. or maybe I'm losing my mind. I think I am. but it's also strangely cloudy.
I was thinking the other day (and today) about graduating. I kept feeling like I was behind because alot of people that I've grown up with graduated this semester and are moving on, but I've still got about a year to go. but THEN I thought, what does graduation mean besides you finished enough school to get a degree? I mean, yeah a degree is important and it opens a lot of doors for job opportunities, but it doesn't change who you are or how much you've accomplished. if I had graduated this semester, I would still be as big of a procrastinator and time waster as I am now. I still wouldn't have a job.. you know? it's like, I was seeing graduates as a higher class of individuals and now I'm realizing that nothing changes. or- it's another expected change that's normal to those who are in college. one day, we will all have degrees (unless we drop out, YEAH). I don't know where I'm going with this.
okay, so. first day of my first summer class. I like it. hopefully I'll learn lots. it's just weird because we have it everyday so I have to read like two books by next week and we have a paper due friday. :/ I will survive!
I was just looking at the checklist of requirements for my major so that I could figure out whether or not I need (or can use) certain other classes that are offered this summer.. and I realize that I don't need to take another french class! I've fulfilled my requirement. well, assuming I pass this semester that is. but it's weird. I'm actually slightly bummed that I don't HAVE to take any more french, because I don't think I'm gonna do it if I don't have to...
some of my friends are taking it again next semester and I was already excited to be in a class with them again. :( I'm such a doofus.
cRazYyy- I just looked outside and it's all cloudy and you can barely see the mountains. or maybe I'm losing my mind. I think I am. but it's also strangely cloudy.
I was thinking the other day (and today) about graduating. I kept feeling like I was behind because alot of people that I've grown up with graduated this semester and are moving on, but I've still got about a year to go. but THEN I thought, what does graduation mean besides you finished enough school to get a degree? I mean, yeah a degree is important and it opens a lot of doors for job opportunities, but it doesn't change who you are or how much you've accomplished. if I had graduated this semester, I would still be as big of a procrastinator and time waster as I am now. I still wouldn't have a job.. you know? it's like, I was seeing graduates as a higher class of individuals and now I'm realizing that nothing changes. or- it's another expected change that's normal to those who are in college. one day, we will all have degrees (unless we drop out, YEAH). I don't know where I'm going with this.
May 10, 2007
it hasn't really sunk in yet..
I'm DONE! with this semester at least.
my stress isn't quite released yet though, I can still feel it. I've been typing madly for the past hour and a half and my hands are still all full of adrenaline. plus it's super quiet in the library now that everyone's done studying and so my typing is sounding REALLY loud. MAYBE I SHOULD JUST TYPE IN ALL CAPS? THIS IS PRETTY MUCH HOW I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW.. haha
ugh. I hope my teacher accepts my paper. technically it was about five minutes late. plus it sucks. it's a sucky paper. he might take one look at it and go, "nope." but all I want is a C.
STRESS. man, I'm finally realizing all of these little things that have been side effects of the past few weeks. my posture is horrid right now, my right arm had a muscle spasm in it all day and my fricking eye has been spazzing out to the max for a few days now. my skin's a wreck, my legs are cramped from lack of stretching (I miss dance) and sitting in chairs. and I think my metabolism is on some stop and go, rush hour traffic thing. I'll eat a cup of cereal and a homemade burrito or two, and I feel like I've gained fifty pounds. but then I'll overload on carbs in the morning and by ten o'clock my stomach is eating itself. ? I'm always confused, maybe I should just leave it alone.
now. I am going home to eat, sleep, and be merry. hurray for summer.
my stress isn't quite released yet though, I can still feel it. I've been typing madly for the past hour and a half and my hands are still all full of adrenaline. plus it's super quiet in the library now that everyone's done studying and so my typing is sounding REALLY loud. MAYBE I SHOULD JUST TYPE IN ALL CAPS? THIS IS PRETTY MUCH HOW I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW.. haha
ugh. I hope my teacher accepts my paper. technically it was about five minutes late. plus it sucks. it's a sucky paper. he might take one look at it and go, "nope." but all I want is a C.
STRESS. man, I'm finally realizing all of these little things that have been side effects of the past few weeks. my posture is horrid right now, my right arm had a muscle spasm in it all day and my fricking eye has been spazzing out to the max for a few days now. my skin's a wreck, my legs are cramped from lack of stretching (I miss dance) and sitting in chairs. and I think my metabolism is on some stop and go, rush hour traffic thing. I'll eat a cup of cereal and a homemade burrito or two, and I feel like I've gained fifty pounds. but then I'll overload on carbs in the morning and by ten o'clock my stomach is eating itself. ? I'm always confused, maybe I should just leave it alone.
now. I am going home to eat, sleep, and be merry. hurray for summer.
May 9, 2007
happy?
I was soooo happy and smiley about half an hour ago, now I've sunk back into my disgruntled sleepiness. MOOD SWINGS!
I got an A on my history of Spain and Portugal term paper! I can't believe it. (actually, I can, but I had my hopes down) I never write as well as I can, or should.
but then I realized I had no one to share it with. I called my mom, no answer. none of my friends would care and besides I wouldn't call a friend just to brag about my A. that's not nice. mom would understand though. boo hoo I sound like a whiner. "I have no one to talk to. wahhh." which is why I write a blog...
that's just one thing that puts me into my sulky mood. two: certain people have been not talking to me lately, and I didn't think it would bother me that much but it IS bothering me. ugh.
three: I'm trying to get happy about the end of the semester (tomorrow- french final, paper due, dun) but that doesn't work either because as soon as tomorrow's over I'll have no reason to wake up in the mornings and no classmates to giggle with. I mean, I'll have a class starting again soon, but I have a feeling it's going to be one of those anti-social atmospheres. I could be wrong of course.
four: I know of lots of people who are having crazy end-of-semester parties, but do I get invited?? no. I'm not cool enough apparently. even though I'm a really good speller and I get super uninhibited/ridiculous when I'm drunk.
five: the weather's nice today. really nice. I just can't enjoy it because I'm going to have to spend my time at a computer writing my stupid paper! I COULD just study for french and type my paper later.. that way I could work outside.
guhh... I hate writing papers. it takes me way longer than it needs to because I always spend 75% of my time thinking or complaining about how much it sucks. I need to go home and sleep. I only got three and a half hours last night.
this band that I just discovered, The Horrors, is remarkably good. I didn't think I would be this into them. :]
man, I'm a rambling idiot. aallll over the place..
I got an A on my history of Spain and Portugal term paper! I can't believe it. (actually, I can, but I had my hopes down) I never write as well as I can, or should.
but then I realized I had no one to share it with. I called my mom, no answer. none of my friends would care and besides I wouldn't call a friend just to brag about my A. that's not nice. mom would understand though. boo hoo I sound like a whiner. "I have no one to talk to. wahhh." which is why I write a blog...
that's just one thing that puts me into my sulky mood. two: certain people have been not talking to me lately, and I didn't think it would bother me that much but it IS bothering me. ugh.
three: I'm trying to get happy about the end of the semester (tomorrow- french final, paper due, dun) but that doesn't work either because as soon as tomorrow's over I'll have no reason to wake up in the mornings and no classmates to giggle with. I mean, I'll have a class starting again soon, but I have a feeling it's going to be one of those anti-social atmospheres. I could be wrong of course.
four: I know of lots of people who are having crazy end-of-semester parties, but do I get invited?? no. I'm not cool enough apparently. even though I'm a really good speller and I get super uninhibited/ridiculous when I'm drunk.
five: the weather's nice today. really nice. I just can't enjoy it because I'm going to have to spend my time at a computer writing my stupid paper! I COULD just study for french and type my paper later.. that way I could work outside.
guhh... I hate writing papers. it takes me way longer than it needs to because I always spend 75% of my time thinking or complaining about how much it sucks. I need to go home and sleep. I only got three and a half hours last night.
this band that I just discovered, The Horrors, is remarkably good. I didn't think I would be this into them. :]
man, I'm a rambling idiot. aallll over the place..
May 8, 2007
revolution
I haven't done this in a while and the idea just popped into my head, so..
I pick a word to google cuz I'm curious to see what search results I'll get. today's pick was "revolution"and the first few websites were:
-the wikipedia definition (of course)
-a soccer team
-pet medication
-some music website
-computer software
-nintendo (?)
yeah, pretty much nothing on the first page about actual revolutions. isn't that bad? I'm slightly disappointed.
and I'm not studying. :(
I hate studying.
I hate school.
but I love music. and that's what I'm doing, looking up music.. and rambling. to a computer.
sigh.
I pick a word to google cuz I'm curious to see what search results I'll get. today's pick was "revolution"and the first few websites were:
-the wikipedia definition (of course)
-a soccer team
-pet medication
-some music website
-computer software
-nintendo (?)
yeah, pretty much nothing on the first page about actual revolutions. isn't that bad? I'm slightly disappointed.
and I'm not studying. :(
I hate studying.
I hate school.
but I love music. and that's what I'm doing, looking up music.. and rambling. to a computer.
sigh.
May 4, 2007
oh boy
so. ?
today's a little cold for May. I like it though. I sold some books back thinking I would get at least $15 or so for them because half of them I bought NEW. but noooo.. $10. that's it. but at least now I have something to spend if I actually go out tonight.
the days go by slow, but the weeks fly by like JETS. next week is our last (or at least, some people's last) and I'm not even that excited. I feel like nothing's exciting anymore because it's all inevitable. someone needs to surprise me.
what do you do when your feelings for someone don't seem to be shared by that person, but then you realize that that person could be so much like you that they are only hiding their feelings.. just like you? I bet that made no sense. I've been thinking about it alot though. same zodiac sign, same age, same eyes... what's the procedure for dealing with your same personality? or is it just a bad idea to try to deal with it at all? ugh. maybe I should just give up. I ALWAYS give up though. I want to at least get an answer this time.
my ramblings aren't getting me anywhere. I feel like I've been thinking in circles. life is never that exciting for me. the clouds look like an army of huge, puffy manatees and they're coming in to save the day. or just to make it rain... which would save my day. I realized why Hawaii seems so green: when it's cloudy, everything green looks greener.
including those eyes.
today's a little cold for May. I like it though. I sold some books back thinking I would get at least $15 or so for them because half of them I bought NEW. but noooo.. $10. that's it. but at least now I have something to spend if I actually go out tonight.
the days go by slow, but the weeks fly by like JETS. next week is our last (or at least, some people's last) and I'm not even that excited. I feel like nothing's exciting anymore because it's all inevitable. someone needs to surprise me.
what do you do when your feelings for someone don't seem to be shared by that person, but then you realize that that person could be so much like you that they are only hiding their feelings.. just like you? I bet that made no sense. I've been thinking about it alot though. same zodiac sign, same age, same eyes... what's the procedure for dealing with your same personality? or is it just a bad idea to try to deal with it at all? ugh. maybe I should just give up. I ALWAYS give up though. I want to at least get an answer this time.
my ramblings aren't getting me anywhere. I feel like I've been thinking in circles. life is never that exciting for me. the clouds look like an army of huge, puffy manatees and they're coming in to save the day. or just to make it rain... which would save my day. I realized why Hawaii seems so green: when it's cloudy, everything green looks greener.
including those eyes.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)